| |
|
Q: How do you make a taxman laugh on boxing
day ?
A: Tell him a joke
on Christmas Eve ! |
 |
| |
Taxman: Doctor, Doctor! Everyone thinks I'm a
liar!
Doctor: I don't believe you! |
| |
Q: Did you hear
about the constipated Accountant?
A: He couldn't budget so he had to work it out
with a pencil! |
| |
Q: What has lots of arms and legs?
A: A happy and successful tax
inspector! |
Q: What is the
difference between a terrorist and a tax inspector?
A:
You can negotiate with a terrorist! |
| |
Q: What do
Accountants suffer from that ordinary people don't?
A: Depreciation.... |
Q: What's black
and tan and looks good on a tax inspector?
A: A doberman... |
| |
|
Q: What did the
terrorist who high-jacked a plane full of
tax inspectors threaten to do if his demands weren't met?
A: Release one every hour... |
The 4 Laws of
Accounting:
- Trial balances don't
- Bank reconciliations never do
- Working Capital does not
- Return on Investments never will
|
| |
|
Q: How do you
drive an Accountant completely insane?
A: Tie him to a chair, stand in front of him and
fold a road map the wrong way. |
| |
|
There are just three types of Accountant, those who can count and those
who can't. |
| |
|
How Accountants do it....
 | Accountants do it by the book... |
| Accountants do it within budget... |
| Accountants do it to the bottom line... |
| Accountants do it with double entry... |
| Accountants do it between spreadsheets... |
| Accountants are Certified to do it in Public... |
| Accountants do it without losing their balance...! |
|
 |
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